I was
hopin' to be
ropin' somethin' wild
in the wild, wild west.
I been settin' till I'm
gettin' kinda riled
at the wild, wild west.
I read about them desperate old guys,
as desperate as men can be.
I reckon it was just
a pack of lies,
the only one who's desperate is me.
I don't care if he's a sheriff
or a real cattle rustlin' heel.
The property I've got ain't hard to steal,
sure deal.
Oh, they say they have
hair on their chest.
The only thing I've seen
is just a fancy vest.
Holy smackers, milk and crackers,
but it's wild in the wild,
wild west.
I was aiming to be
claiming me a part
in the wild, wild west.
I was looking to be tooken off my guard
in the wild, wild west.
They told me that the
outlaws captured you,
and never set a lady free.
I heard they held them all
for ransom too,
but evidently ransom
don't want me.
All that prattle about the cattle
being left on the range
to graze.
Well, don't they ever have no round -up days,
I raise?
Yeah, I heard about them western chaps
I've only seen the kind
you wear around your laps
Sarsaparilla, citronella,
but it's wild in the wild, wild west
I've got a hanker -run to be
Occupying a cowboy's knee
I like romance,
but it don't like me, yip, yip
It's too darn mild in the wild,
wild way