I'm tall and tan and handsome,
and my skis are parallel.
My poles are always held just so,
as down the hill I slide.
And the ladies all admire me,
My skis are waxed correctly
And I speak with an Austrian accent,
though I come from Idaho.
Young ladies watch me closely
and cast me glances warm.
They fondly sigh as I cristy -by
I demonstrate to mambo the
And if the girls get covered with snow,
I'll brush it off for them
I aid each maid religiously
in whatever she tries to do
and clean her gozzles too
I'm reaching the base of the mountain
With my student, sweet and fair
With a gesture fine I cut the line
And escort her to a chair
And as we ascend the mountain
And give her the word on the things which
I've heard are needed to make a skier
So if you would be an instructor,
pay heed to the secrets I've told
If the gal is fair, be devil -ne 'er,
Impress her with your ability,
but don't let her ever say no.
Remind her that skiing with no sex involved
is nothing but cold, cold snow.
Now that is the end of my essay
on the ski instruction bit.
and it's guaranteed you'll
well what about menfolks?
Don't you instruct them too?
it's good enough for them
They're just after them womenfolks too you
