When I snuck into your house
And took roofies with your spouse
Lice are lousy all the time
They suck your blood drink your wine
Say shut up and quit your crying
Give it time and you'll be
You're so nice and you're so smart
You're such a good friend
I have to break your heart
I'll tell you that I love you
then I'll tear your world apart
Just pretend I didn't tear your world apart
I like boys with strong convictions
And convicts with perfect diction
Underdogs with good intentions
Amputees with stamp collections
Plywood skinboards ride the ocean
Salty noses, suntan lotion
And rambunctiously soft-spoken
I like boys that like their mothers
And I have a thing for brothers
til we're under the covers
To say I'm sure glad we're not
You're so nice and you're so smart
You're such a good friend
I have to break your heart
I'll tell you that I love you
then I'll tear your world apart
Just pretend I didn't tear your world apart