Jaws all on the floor like Pam
Like Tommy just burstin' the door
They started whoopin' her ass
They first were divorced,
sewin' her over furniture
Oh wait, no wait, you're kidding
He didn't just say what I think he did,
Nothing, idiots, Dr. Dre's dead,
he's locked in my basement
Feminist women love him and him
Slim Shady, I'm sick of him
Look at him, walkin' around,
rappin' his you -know -what
Flippin' a you -know -who
Yeah, but he's so cute though
Yeah, I probably got a couple
of screws up in my head loose
But no worse than what's goin' on
in your parents' bedrooms
Sometimes I wanna get on TV
you might just give it a little kiss
that we deliver to little kids
And expect them not to know
what a woman's clitoris is
Of course they're gonna know
By the time they hit fourth grade
They got the Discovery Channel,
We ain't nothing but mammals
Well, some of us cannibals
Who cut other people open
But if we can hump dead animals
that a man and another man can't elope
But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
Wo men, wave your pantyhose
Sing the chorus and it goes
I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real shady
All you other Slim Shadys
So won't the real Slim Shady
please stand up, please stand up
all you other Slim Shadys are
So won't the real Slim Shady
please stand up, please stand up
Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps
to sell records, well I do
So fuck him and fuck you too,
if you think I give a damn about a Grammy
Half of you critics can't
But Slim, what if you win,
So you guys can just lie to get me here,
so you can sit me here next
Christina Aguilera better
So I can sit next to Carson Daly
And hear him argue over who
Little bitch put me on blast on MTV
think he's married to Kim
I should download her audio on MP3
I'm sick of you little girl
So I have been sitting here to destroy you
And there's a million of us just like me
who just don't give a fuck like me
And just might be the next best thing
All you other Slim Shadys
So won't the real Slim Shady
Please stand up, please stand up
All you other Slim Shadys
So won't the real Slim Shady
Please stand up, please stand up
I'm like a head trip to listen to
Cause I'm only giving you things
you joke about with your friends
the only difference is I got the balls
To say it in front of y 'all
and I don't gotta be false
I just get on a mic and spit it
and whether you'd like to admit it
I just shit it better than 90 %
Then you wonder how can kids eat up
these albums like Valiums
It's funny, cause at the rate
I'll be the only person in
the nursing home flirting
while I'm jacking off a Jurgens
He could be working at Burger King,
spitting on your onion rings
Or in the parking lot circling,
screaming I don't give a fuck
With his windows down and his system up
So will the real shady please stand up
Put one of those fingers on each hand up
And be proud to be out of your mind
And one more time, loud as you can,
All you other Slim Shadys
So won't the real Slim Shady
Please stand up, please stand up
All you other Slim Shadys
So won't the real Slim Shady
Please stand up, please stand up
All you other Slim Shadys
So won't the real Slim Shady
please stand up, please stand up,
all you other Slim Shadys
So won't the real Slim Shady
please stand up, please stand up,
Haha, guess there's a Slim
Fuck it, let's all stand up
