Patriotic Poem 创作者：
Larry The Cable Guy

N/A

调：Ab major•

Verse 1
Ab Ab 4
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Now, here's a poem I read
just to piss off the political craig libs,
and quite, if you listen close,
you'll actually hear them cuss
and slice their wrists.
Remember, when you can make
these folks so mad
they spend their entire life bitchin' about you,
it's a good day.
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Ab Ab 4
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So let's begin.
T 'was the night before Christmas,
went all through the land,
not a creature was turned,
cause Christmas was banned.
The children was taught
that the name Jesus shouldn't be said,
while the indoctrination
of Muhammad
was drilled in their head.
And Mom in her nightgown
and me in my camo cap
had just gotten finished bitchin'
about all that commie crap.
When up in the sky we heard a loud zoom,
that we sprung from our humpin' to
hear a loud boom.
Away to the window I hobbled cause I'm fat,
cracked open hurricane shutters
and damn near shot.
Eb Eb 6
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The moon on the breast of my wife,
that's so fine,
Ab Ab 4
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made me stop and think,
I can't believe she's
actually mine.
One what to my redneck sumbitch eyes did I see,
but a pissed ex -president by the
name of Ron E.
More rapid than crap
threw a goose he done came
and was angry with the anti
-American PC libs
and called him by name.
I'm ashamed of you, Carrie,
and you too, Michael Moore,
and don't get me started
on that fat f**k I was over.
Hillary, you're a joke.
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What have you ever done?
Sipped right on Bill's
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coattails
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and turned your head when he had fun.
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And two -thirds of my party,
I'm ashamed of you too,
putting your personal gain
in front of the job you was elected
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to do.
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And Rosie, oh damn,
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Ab Ab 4
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where do I start?
In the grand scheme of things,
your life is merely a fart.
Last night I seen JFK in Washington
too.
They was all ashamed
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at what they're turning the country into.
Ab Ab 4
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And   he was dressed in fur
from his head to his feet
just to piss off Peeta.
I thought that was neat.
He walked like he was young.
That boy still had class.
He looked the same as he did
the day he kicked Mondale's
ass.
And then he stopped for a minute
and he said a few words.
Not a long speech,
but enough to make Ted Kennedy
feel like a big turd.
Then he turned and he smiled
and he give a thumbs up said
Merry Christmas everyone.
Be sure you speak up
Freedom ain't free.
It ain't never been
America is great and we'll be again
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Fm Fm 
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and as he was erased from my mind
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Cb Cb 2
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I got a big smile
Ab Ab 4
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and I had a sense of pride.
ain't felt in quite a while
So if you don't like this country
Ab Ab 4
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and you're pissed at what we do
Then I say drag your skank ass
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somewhere else
and see how you do
I'm sure you'll be back,
cause you'll find it to be true.
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There ain't no better place
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than the red, white, and blue.