调：Bb major•
Verse 1
One little evening alone, home
End up with carpal tunnel syndrome
Grown and living off of Little
Debbie snack cakes
Supposed to be checking e-mails
Gm
G
Bb
All All I got is messages from ass
Verse 2
B
And that's the last time I saw her
than the Girl Scouts
I wonder what I owe her
Gb
B
For a whole box of caramel coconut Samoa
to get serious like Peek Freans
A metal hand full, wipe it on the quilt
Fully clothed winter and I
right there wit cha
Thinking about the last time
I split your wishbone
A man could only wish you could
do the same 'til he get home
Jack
Gm
G
Bb
And hope one of his peoples can
hook him with a tri-pack
B
Bm
Bb
That's That's three
different flavors
B
Bb
Chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry wafers
'bout to get beat up
What the hell do she know
A workaholic with a fountain in the ink pen
Out in the mountains and
I stopped drinking again
In the wee hours he's gotten farther
where her egg went
I need a L, it's hard to drink without it
not to think about it
Every other commercial,
college hoes gone wild
Soft batch, I prefer the other bunch,
G
Gm
G
Bb
Gb
Verse 3
B
Bb
B
Bb
Wheat Thins, Saltines, or Triscuits
G
Bb
Catch sugar fits every time that he sees
Chips Ahoy,
and the junk in the trunk
No matter what weather
B
Bb
It's cheaper than a short stay at the day's
Gm
Bb
inn and good like 25 cent oatmeal raisin
B
G
Bb
Give a hand to who invented the camera
animals and grandmas
Verse 4
It might seem ill
Ab
Gm
Bb
"Ew! Go wash your hands!"
Outro 1
Bb
G
Gb
G
Gm
G
B
F#
Eb
Gb
Eb
F
F
B
F#
B
D#
F#
A#
B
D#
F#
F
F#
B
D#
B
D#
B
A
B
D#
D#
F#
D#
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