I'll tell you a story that
One day I went down to a cork by the sea
The sun it was hot and the day it was warm
I went in and he asked for
Says the barman, I'm sorry,
Try whiskey or patty, ten years in the wood
No, says I, I'll try cider,
Oh never, oh never, oh never again
Not even lift to a hundred
I fell to the floor and I couldn't get up
Where I bumped into Brody,
don't you know I'm the law?
Well, I upped with my fist
with his knees doubled up
The next thing I remember
down in Cork -by -the -Sea
Was a cripple on crutches
across to the Slattery's bar?
He threw down his crutches
And never, and never, and never again
I never lived to a hundred
For I fell to the floor and
After drinking four pints
I went up the Lee Road, a friend for the sea
They called it the Madhouse
But when I did get there,
sure the truth I would tell
They had this poor bugger
say these words if you can
the ragged rascal went home
It was only 70 pints of the cider I had
And never, and never, and never again
I couldn't get up after drink
Well, a man died in the mines
They washed him and laid him
his wife brought him home
and the beer went all high
until they bring them a pint
Oh never, oh never, oh never again
After drinking some pints
So if you ever go down a cork by the sea
Stay away from the aisle house,
If you want to stay sane,
don't you dare take one sip
Drink cider called Johnny Jump Up
Oh, oh never, oh never, oh never again
I never lived to a hundred,
I couldn't get up after drinking a quart
4.9
