My daddy was a smart man,
day I turned thirty -five
Pop, tonight's my very first date,
can you lend me some advice?
He put his arm around me,
ruffled the hair on my head
But then the weirdest thing,
he sat me on his knee and said
He said, I was on my very first date
Me and your mama went down by the lake
She took off her top, said,
Everything seemed to be in order
Till I couldn't feel my pack
Well, out I jumped, gave it a rub
Before your mama could tell
My little turtle was turnin' purple
There ain't a lot to say downstairs
When it's cold in the water
And there's a little chill in the air
He said, it usually ain't that shrunk
If you're anything like it, that's sunk
He said, whatever you do tonight
He said, I was a little too late to hide it
she was standin' there beside it
And she said to me, should I call 9 -1 -1?
I said, don't be stupid, darlin'
Just go down there and blow a little on it
and that's why you're here, son
There ain't a lot to say downstairs
When it's cold in the water
And there's a little chilly in the air
He said, it usually ain't that small
There's a lot more chicken
And if it's anything like it,
that's its finger lickin'
You better stay out of the cold
He said, whatever you do tonight