Argument

Argument 的简化版吉他和弦，作者为 Monty Python

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    • Verse 1
    I'd 
    like to have an argument, 

    please 

    Certainly, 
    sir 
    have you been 
    here before? 

    No, 
    this is my first 
    time i 

    see 
    well 

    Were you thinking 
    of taking 

    a five 

    Minute argument 
    or 
    a 
    course? 

    Well, 
    what's the cost? 

    It's 
    1 for a five 
    minute argument 

    But it's 
    8 for a course 
    of ten 

    I think I'll take 
    the five 
    minutes 


    And see how it progresses 

    Very 
    well 
    now, Mr hayward isn't 

    Free 
    at the moment, 
    nor 
    is Mr baker 

    Here 
    we 
    go, 
    Mr maynard, Room 

    12 thank you 

    What do you want?! 

    Well, I was 
    told outside - 

    Don't 
    give me that 

    You snotty- 
    faced heap 

    of parrot droppings! 

    What?! 
    Shut your 
    festering gob, 

    you tit! 

    Your type 
    really 
    makes me 

    puke, you pervert! 

    What 
    are you doing?! I 
    came 

    In here for an argument! 

    Oh! I'm sorry, 
    but this is 
    abuse 

    Oh, 
    that explains it 

    Yes, 
    you want Room 
    12A next 

    door thank 
    you 

    Not at 
    all 
    (Door shuts) Stupid 
    git 

    Is the right 
    room for an argument? 


    I've told you once 

    no, you didn't 

    Yes, I did when? 

    Just now 
    no, you didn't 

    Yes, I did no, 
    you didn't 

    Excuse 
    me is 
    the five minute 

    Argument or the 
    half hour? 

    Oh, just the 
    five minute 

    Thank 
    you 
    anyway, I did tell you 

    No, you most 
    certainly did not 

    Let's get 
    one thing 
    straight: I 

    Most definitely 
    told you 
    no, 
    you didn't 

    Yes, 
    I did no, you didn't 

    Yes, I did no, you didn't 

    Yes, I 
    did 
    this isn't an argument! 

    Yes, it is 

    No, it isn't it's just contradiction 

    No, it isn't 

    Yes, it is 
    you just 
    contradicted me 


    No, I didn't yes, you did 

    No, no, no 
    you did just 
    then 

    That's 
    ludicrous oh, this 
    is futile 

    No, it 
    isn't 

    I came in here 
    for a good argument 


    No, you didn't you came 

    in 

    Here for an argument 

    Well, argument isn't 
    the 

    Same as contradiction 
    can be 

    No, 
    it can't 

    An 
    argument is a collective 
    series of 

    Statements 
    intended 
    to establish 

    A proposition 
    no, 
    it isn't 

    Yes, 
    it is 
    it isn't just contradiction 

    Look, 
    if I argue 
    with you i 

    Must take 
    a contrary position 

    But it 
    isn't just saying No, 
    it isn't 

    Yes, it is 
    no, it isn't 
    argument's 


    An intellectual protest 

    Contradiction 
    just the automatic 

    Opposite of 
    any 

    Statement the other 
    person makes 

    No, it 
    isn't yes, it is 

    Not at all now, look 

    - (Bell dings) 

    Good morning 
    what? 

    That's it 
    good morning 

    I was just getting interested 

    I'm sorry, 

    the five minutes is up 

    That was not five 
    minutes i'm afraid 

    it was 

    Oh, no, it wasn't 

    (Argument professional looks around the 

    room) 

    I'm sorry 

    But I'm not allowed to argue anymore 

    what? 

    If you want to go 
    on arguing you'll 

    Have to pay 
    for another five minutes 


    But that was not five 
    minutes, just now 


    (Professional whistles) Oh, come on 

    If 
    you want to 
    continue 
    arguing 

    You must 
    pay for another 

    five minutes 

    Oh, fine here 
    thank you 

    Well? 
    Well what? 

    That was not five 
    minutes, just then 

    I told you, 
    you have to pay 

    i just paid 

    No, you didn't yes, I did 

    No, you didn't 

    I 
    don't want to argue 

    about that 

    Well, you didn't pay 

    Ah, but 
    if I didn't pay 

    Why 
    are you arguing? Aha! Got you 


    No, you haven't 

    Yes, I 
    have if you're arguing 

    I must have paid 

    Not 
    necessarily 
    i could be 

    arguing 

    In my spare time 
    oh, I've had enough of this 


    No, you haven't oh, shut 

    up! 


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